Monday, May 23, 2011

Things that make me keel over and go ARRGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!

There are things that I can tolerate. And there are things that I can't. And these things specifically could make me go into violent convulsions when I think about how atrocious they are.
Unfortunately, so many have become victims. Enough of the ramblings. Ladies and gentlemen, here are the things that make me keel over and go ARRRGHHHHHHH.....

Treadmills, Elliptical Machines and the likes of them

I Know!! WTF right????

Like the innocent/ignorant mass, I too slaved upon these machines thinking that it would help me gain cardiovascular endurance. Instead, all it did was provide me with the much dreaded cortisol.

Worse still, a lot of people who want to lose weight think they have no choice but to subject themselves to hours upon hours of boring, monotonous 'exercise' when in fact there are better ways to burn off those excess fat and gain muscle.

And don't get me started on those foolish enough to buy a treadmill (all of them are bloody expensive) only to use it as a gigantic clothes hanger 2 weeks down the road.

Corsets
Yeah... right.

Everytime I open my Facebook page some nitwit will be promoting this stupid corset you wear underneath your clothes which apparently helps you to burn fat while making you look slimmer. Oh... My... God.... seriously??? SERIOUSLYYYYY???? I mean, geeee... if it was that easy we won't see so many overweight people walking around right?

And maybe it does help you look slim. But what happens when you take off that godforsaken corset at the end of the day? All those flabby bits are finally free from their confinement and the reality is, you still don't look good naked, baby.

Herbalies Herbalife


Herbalife. What can I say? Maybe it's not the product. Maybe it's the agents that make cringe and entertain the thoughts of murder. I remember when I first entertained the thought of joining the gym. I asked around about affordable gyms and this fuckwit told me that I don't need to spend money for a gym membership. All I need to do was consume Herbalife crap and I'd look a heck of a lot better. Even back then, I knew it was crap.

Then there were the comments made in DM's blog by one of his readers. The reader mentioned that after taking herbalife, he feels a whole lot healthier. His skin was not botchy anymore. Heck, Herbalife was sooo good that it even made his crooked teeth straight.

All I could think of is that that guy may be one heck of an ugly dude.

Meal Replacement Powders (MRPs)
Okay, to be fair MRPs are not that bad if a person knows how to use it. You can use it to avoid catabolism when you really don't have time to have a proper meal. But if you're pretty much on a liquid diet than you're just asking for trouble. Sure, you might lose weight but be warned that you will gain it all back. Plus a few extra kilos for good measure.

Smith Machine, Leg Press Machine, and other similar stuff
I think my readers already know my disdain for all things machine related. Say all you want about the virtues of these monstrosities but it won't beat free weights. Not now. Not ever.

3 comments:

Rajan said...

Aizan: The corset thing is really funny. How did the lady lose all that fat on her face?

I had a friend who was actually hired to model for a slimming agency. She is slim and fit. Since she was never fat, they actually used photo editing to create her before picture...ie making her look fat and it ran as an ad for quite some time in news papers and billboards.

That's just really low.... sigh.

Mohd Shahril said...

i agree with you. now adays anyone can do photo editing. i hate ALL cardio machine because its does nothing to make you fit.

Adeline said...

yes, yes, yes, yes & yes. Totally agree on EVERYTHING!